Real and Fake Silent Movie Kids (and their sudden, violent outbursts)

I am on record as enormously disliking the performances of most child stars of the talkie era. With notable exceptions (Our Gang for one), they are simpering, over-rehearsed and just generally tedious. Talkie kids? Blech! Silent movie kids? Best. Kids. Ever.

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Things to Do on a Date (According to Silent Films)

So you’ve got this great date lined up but then your plans fall through. What to do? Never fear! Silent movies have great ideas for romantic days and nights out. (But don’t try this at home. Seriously. Don’t.)

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Silent Movie Style: The Hats! The Hats! (Gents Edition)

I posted about women’s hats in silent film a while back and received several requests for the same coverage of men’s headgear. So, here we are!

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Silent Movie Style: The Hats! The Hats!

The silent era coincided with a glorious time for hats. The 1890s-1910s featured teetering mounds of feathers, beads and sometimes entire birds while the 1920s moved toward the sleek and modern. (Though they were not entirely opposed to the concept of teetering mounds.) And one rule held true through much of the era: You could never, ever go wrong with a tam o’ shanter.

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Natural Color is for People with No Imagination: A Small Stencil & Hand-Color Movie Sampler

“Old black and white silent movies” is a pretty common phrase. It’s also baloney as the majority of silent films were at least tinted. But today, I’m going to share my favorite kind of movie color: pigments applied by hand and by stencil. And I’ll be using GIFs to do it!

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To drink or not to drink, that is the question

One of the biggest political debates of the silent era was the question of alcohol. Should it be legal? Was it evil? Is a vodka martini really a martini? (It is not. A “vodka martini” is a kangaroo.)

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Scram, Scat, Shoo: The Best Silent Movie GIFs for Telling People to Shove Off

There are times when people just need to go away. In the real world, we can hang up the phone, close the door, walk away. Online, it can be a little trickier and some people never take the hint.

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Silent Movie Romance Fails! or, This love affair isn’t going so well, is it?

Silent movies are famous for their love scenes but even in their romantic world, affairs do not always go as planned. We’re going to be enjoying some romance fails of the silent era.

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Lobby Card Dissection: The Sheik, or, “Rudolph Valentino? Who’d pay to see him?”

Like most silent movie fans, I also enjoy the quirky marketing materials of the era. Posters, lobby cards, ads, etc. I recently ran across a lobby card for The Sheik and a few things struck me as pretty funny. Let’s share!

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I don’t want to get out of bed and neither do these silent movie characters

I say all summer that I can’t wait for cold weather. Well, it’s here and the problem with cold weather is that it’s cold. It makes waking up a decidedly unpleasant process. #FirstWorldProblems

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In which silent movie stars (and one parrot) tell people off in the rudest way possible

Silent film characters sometimes get just a little fed up and that’s when the title cards get a little spicy. Oh my!

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Awkward and Adorkable Flirting of the Silent Era

If you’ve only seen the Great Lover style of flirting in silent movies (Valentino, Gilbert, etc.) then you are missing out! Sweeping romantic gestures are all well and good but there is something to be said for adorkable.

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How to be a silent movie heroine

Silent movie heroine? You mean those fainting damsels in distress? The ones imperiled by locomotives and buzzsaws?

Guess what, darlings? You’ve been lied to. Silent movie heroines are awesome.

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Silent movie star GIFs celebrate the lost art of the handwritten letter

I wouldn’t trade email and other instant communication for anything but there is something wonderful about a handwritten letter, especially one written on lovely stationary. Of course, letters were still alive and well during the silent era so let’s enjoy a few letter scenes with the stars of the era.

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Random GIFs that prove silent movies are the most beautiful movies

Silent movies are often portrayed as scratchy, jittery things with warped ragtime piano playing in the background. In reality, silent films were meticulously crafted, as beautiful today as they were when they were first released.

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When you’re just blah. (GIF edition)

I don’t know about you but I have a bad case of the blahs. It has been one of those blah weeks and I haven’t recovered from the blahness of it all. Silent movie stars had the same problem sometimes.

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Silent Take: Star Trek circa 1926

Today marks the 50th anniversary of Star Trek’s network debut and I knew I had to do something to celebrate. What better way than to reimagine it as a silent film? (Don’t answer that!)

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Silent movie people handling disputes in a calm, measured, mature manner

A true measure of maturity is how well one handles disputes. These silent movie people did so with grace and intelligence. (I’m lying.)

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Why we can’t have nice things: Silent movie mischief before the Code

Most classic film fans know that after 1934, the movies were toned down considerably. What they may not know is that the crazy tug-of-war between censors and filmmakers extended all the way back to the dawn of film.

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Teatime in the silent movies!

The best beverage in the world is also the most popular: tea! Alas, I live in a nation of tea philistines. Microwaved water with dusty teabags? No, thank you! Is it any wonder I always order the coffee when I am out and about?

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In which silent movie people finally lose it (I suggest you duck)

They’re mad as heck and they aren’t taking it anymore! Anyone still laboring under the notion that silent movies were staid affairs will surely have to change their minds. So there.

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You have failed as a gentleman and a lover. Now get out of my sight.

Silent movies are famous for their romances. Who can forget Rudolph Valentino’s red hot romancing? Or John Barrymore’s professions of love? This post is not about them. Today, it’s all about the guys who are lovesick and fail miserably with the object of their affection. Awww, so sad.

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Hat power! (In which I am inordinately amused by headgear)

There are few things that date a film faster than its headgear. Cloche hats, pillboxes, fascinators… All say something about the time and setting of the film. In that spirit, let’s have a bit of fun with silent movie hats!

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Five snotty GIFs you can use to answer snotty questions about classic and silent movies.

I want to start this out by saying that there is nothing wrong with being a newbie. Everyone has to start somewhere and asking questions is the best way to expand your knowledge. Genuinely curious people, these GIFs are not directed at you.

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There’s no need for violence! Oh… maybe there is

Silent films convey their message through physical acting and there are times when gentler movements are not enough. The answer: random bursts of violence.

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Americans, amiright?

Hollywood is shorthand for the film industry as a whole and so it’s hardly surprising that the industry would reference its own nation of origin from time to time.

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Things that will get you kicked out of the local Starbucks

The best thing about silent films? Their unpredictability. The rules of filmmaking were still being written and silent cinema had a way of going gloriously off the rails. Here’s to the madness!

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Silent Take: “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” circa 1927

Welcome back! I occasionally make posters for modern films reimagined as silents. This time around, I will be seeing what a certain 1980s comedy classic would look like in the silent era.

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Okay, you go bye now.

Some people just don’t get it. That’s okay, it happens in silent movies too. Let’s see how they deal with the problem.

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Disturbing animal interactions, or, “You have had your shots, right?”

When it comes to animals, silent movies can be a little… eccentric.

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